Child Development

Diva Kids – “Finding ways for kids to share”

Points to emphasize –

Do create fun games to teach kids how to share. Kids have short attention spans and in some cases may not even be old enough to fully grasp the lesson you are trying to teach them. Using games is a fun way to get your message across and the thrill of winning the game will make them want to follow the rules.

Do allow kids to try to work it out amongst themselves first. Or act as a mediator and give them options for how to share. Since sharing is a developmental process this method would allow them to learn problem-solving techniques, which can extend to all types of situations down the line – not just sharing!

Suggest another game the kids can play or some other distraction Drawing back on the short attention span point we brought up before, sometimes its  more effective to turn their attention to something else! Ideally you may want to pick an activity where there are identical items or enough for the kids to share without pointing fingers and saying “But I wanted that one!” This method also works wonders for moms who may be too tired or stressed out at the moment to worry about teaching their kids lesson.

Use positive enforcement when kids DO share with others. A simple “That was very nice of you” or some other type of reward for sharing can go a long way in boosting a child’s self esteem and it makes them more likely to want to share again.

Remember not every situation is a sharing situation. While we want them to be generous, as parents we also have to stop and examine the situation. Sometimes making older and younger children share their stuff isn’t the wisest. Especially if it has a sentimental value to the older child or is not appropriate for your younger one. In this case, you should try to calmly explain why the item is off limits. 

Make sure your kids don’t feel entitled to have everything shared with them. Sometimes in teaching kids it is important to share they take the lesson completely the wrong way and demand to have everything shared with them; without even asking. To alleviate this type of situation and hopefully stop a lot of arguments before they happen; teach kids to ask permission before simply taking another’s toy or item.

Take turns. Sure this method sounds easier in print than it does in practice, but in reality trying to get kids to constantly take turns can be a nightmare for parents. Instead of forcing the kids to take turns by screaming and then grabbing the toy and handing it to the other child, try and allow kids to help decide a schedule works. If it’s a particular toy that is the trouble sit down with them to decide who should play first and for how long and explain to them that because they helped come up with the rules they must obey them.

Lastly, your kids sharing will be beneficial.  The encouragement and positive feedback your child gets from sharing will be a huge reward.  You will proudly witness your child develop into a sharing and caring adult.

Got to love it 😉